October is My Sunday School Month

Stories from Children's Church

One boy was looking at me for a little bit. Then, to the shock of me and my fellow teacher, he blurted out, "Why don't you take your shirt off?" When we asked him what he meant, he explained that he noticed I was wearing two shirts. I guess the idea of an undershirt seems excessive to a five year old boy. I'm starting to realize just how much I will have to learn with my son.

A little girl said she would pray for our snack while we were in the middle of the lesson. After the lesson, we passed out drinks and napkins. A boy said "Where's our crackers?!" The other teacher said, "Well, we have to pray fir-" but before he could finish the word 'first,' the girl interrupted him by practically yelling, "DEAR GOD!" We all missed the first line in a mad scramble to bow our heads and fold our hands, and then I missed the rest of her 'outside voice' prayer because I was concentrating on not laughing.

Next week:

As we were going around the circle, introducing ourselves and our favorite animals, a girl raised her hand out of turn. "Yes?" I asked. "It looks like that's the baby's nose." she said as she pointed at my stomach. "Oh! That's my belly button!" I smiled as the girl looked bashful, and as a few of the other kids said, "Oooh!" like they had been wondering all along.

Then a little boy blurted out, "How does the baby get out of there?!" My shock at the question helped me stall long enough to assess the room's reactions. Most of the kids looked like that was a good question they hadn't thought to ask... until now. A few kids giggled, one of which said, "I don't think we're supposed to talk about that." I was in mixed company. I realized I couldn't get away with a truthful, but vague answer. The few kids who seemed to know probably wouldn't let me get away with a lie. Ironically the lesson I was about to teach was over the ninth commandment, anyway. After all this pondering, I ended up giving the children a seven second pause that they used to get bored with the subject, and turned back to their favorite animals. Whew!

Next week:

One boy interrupted the lesson with his hand raised. He then told a random but short story about a pocket knife. Of course, the result was that every other boy in the class had their hand raised before he had finished. The teacher doing the lesson let each boy tell his knife story. One went like this. "One time, I cut my finger off with a pocket knife. But then my mom blowed it back on. I don't know why she blowed it, but now it's on for good." He then started pulling on his pinkie finger as hard as he could.

Throughout this series on the ten commandments, we often stress that everyone sins. To enforce this, I had the children play the "Have you ever..." game with a circle of chairs. I went first with, "Have you ever told a lie?" The other teacher caught on and even some of the kids did too with questions like, "Have you ever not obeyed your parents?" or "Have you ever sinned?" One five year old stood up with "Have you ever killed your dog?" There was a pause, and I managed to hold in my laugh. "Well! I guess that's nobody! It looks like you'll have to go again!"